Author Archives: quedge9

The Most Disturbing Thing I Ever Did Online (Ever!)

The Most Disturbing Thing I Ever Did Online (Ever!)

Sometimes I talk to students who are very frightened of making a mistake and publicly humiliating themselves in their marketing… so I thought I’d share the ABSOLUTE WORST THING I EVER DID ONLINE, because short of pulling an “Anthony Weiner,” there’s no way you could possibly top this one.  If I survived something this bad, you can too.

OK, so the WORST thing I ever did on the internet was on September 12th, 2001.
Long story short, I started a WAR on the internet!

See, given that Sharon and I were psychologists just outside of NYC, right after 9/11 happened (literally the day after) we thought it would be a good idea to send out a broadcast to our 20,000 subscribers offering to do free support groups about the trauma.  We were genuinely motivated to do a good thing…

But here’s how it played out:

  • Entered “9/11 Support Group” as the subject line
  • Forgot that the system automatically pre-pended “GET PAID:” to the subject line because it was a custom email system built for recruiting focus group participants.
  • Body of message was “Reply with your name, gender, phone, and age if you’d like to come to the group”
  • The programmer apparently made a mistake and set it up so that when anyone replied, the reply went to all 20,000 people on the list. And then if people replied to THAT reply, that went to all 20,000 people too.
  • The first reply was from a young woman who wrote: “I’m 24, female, and I’d like to come. My phone number is____”, and this went out to all 20,000 people with the subject line “GET PAID: 9/11 Support Group.”

As you can imagine, several hundred of these people replied back with incredibly irate messages… which, of course, proceed to be broadcast to all 20,000 people too.  And then they started fighting with each other.  Some even made death threats. And it just kept escalating!

It took us a few hours to realize what was happening and shut down the server, but by then the president of our trade association had called us to admonish us, along with most of our best clients and friends.

We spent the next week handling the angry phone calls and threats, day and night. We had to bring in attorneys.  We had to settle with the woman who wrote the first reply to avoid a law suit.

What a nightmare!

But you know what?

In the end, we were still standing…
The WORST thing I ever did on the internet (I dare you to beat this!) (TELL story of 20,000 people email fiasco on 9/12/2001)

Just thought you’d like to know what I did one time way back on September 12th, 2001.
Long story short, I started a war on the internet:

– Thought it would be a good idea to send out a broadcast to our 20,000 subscribers offering to do free support groups about 9/11

– Wrote the subject line as “9/11 Support Group”

– Forgot that the system automatically pre-pended “GET PAID:” to the subject line because it was for focus group participants.

– Body of message was “Reply with your name, gender, phone, and age if you’d like to come to the group”

– The programmer apparently made a mistake and set it up so that when anyone replied, the reply went to all 20,000 people on the list. And then if people replied to THAT reply, that went to all 20,000 people too.

The first reply was from a young woman who write “I’m 24, female, and I’d like to come. My phone number is____”, and this went out to all 20,000 people with the subject line “GET PAID: 9/11 Support Group.”

As you can imagine, at least 1,000 of these people replied back with irate messages. Some with death threats. And it just kept escalating from there.

It took us a few hours to realize what was happening and shut down the server, but by then the president of our trade association had called us to admonish us, along with most of our best clients.

We spent the next week living at the office handling the angry phone calls and threats. I had to bring in attorneys. I had to settle with the woman who wrote the first reply to avoid a law suit.

What a nightmare!

And while I’d never recommend starting an internet war on purpose in order to get the attention of your long-unheard-from clients… many of them sympathized with us once they heard the story and actually gave us MORE business.  (Crazy, right?)

So what should you take away from all this?

D.W. Winnicott said “The Nightmare We Fear Most is the One We’ve Already Been Through”…

The odds are, whatever mistake you make in your marketing won’t harm you to the extent you’re frightened it will.  Most entrepreneurs spend so much time worrying about what negative thing might happen if X comes to pass, they never stop to consider that if X happens, Y positive thing might be hiding behind it.

And since frequency of contact is one of the pivotal foundations for increasing conversion…

Your fear of communicating with your audience more is likely doing you more harm than their negative reactions might.

Food for thought,

Glenn 🙂

PS – You can still ask me LIVE questions about your marketing once a month in the MakeThemBuy.com club for just $9.95.

 

Four Dirty 4-Letter Words in Internet Marketing

———————————-
Live Web Critique Club with Glenn – now just $9.95/mo
———————————-

The Dirtiest 4-Letter Words in Internet Marketing?



1) WORK
2) WHEN
3) RISK
4) TIME

Listen, this is NOT the first loaf of bread I’ve baked!   I’ve been around the internet marketing game almost as long as anyone else.  I’ve seen more pitches and appeals than you could possibly imagine.  And given I’ve chosen to teach marketing, I’ve also spent many long, hard nights laying awake thinking about why so few people genuinely succeed.

It pains me, it really does.  But most people in this game are so terrified of the truth, they stop reading when anyone starts to disclose it.  You’ve got to be a little bit of a masochist to step out and say what I’m about to say if you still expect to be able to sell your materials.

On the other hand, anything of significant I’ve ever accomplished in my life came from facing reality square in the face, and then driving forward with intellect and fortitude until it yielded.  Everything.  So before we get to WHY “work, when, risk, and hire” are the four dirtiest four-letter words in internet marketing, let’s start with a challenge question…

I CHALLENGE YOU TO ANSWER THIS: Is there ANYTHING of significance in your own life which came to you without hard work, risk, deadline-focused commitment, and persistence over time?  Anything?

When I ask people this question, perhaps 5% quote some lucky break.  But upon further reflection and prompting they inevitably conclude “luck favors the prepared.”  People who seem lucky from afar have usually worked VERY hard to put themselves in a position to take full advantage of the situation which seemed to “fall in their lap.”

Success requires we deal with four letter words!  It takes the ability to put in the work, the willingness to commit to deadlines (“when”) , the cajones to take risk, and the ability to play the long game (“time.”)

Perhaps the toughest part is this: As an entrepreneur you don’t get the kind of linear, step by step feedback we were all trained to love in school.  You don’t really know if you’ve “passed the first grade” or not because money doesn’t come out the end of the pipeline if there’s even one leak along the way…

So we all suffer with constantly agonizing decisions on how to balance these four letter monsters.  Being an entrepreneur inevitably means having way more projects and opportunities than you can possibly handle, and having to take more risks with your resources than any of us ever really grow comfortable with… no matter how big we get.

The good news is, there are tools and systems for making these decisions much easier.

One of my favorites is a simple little spreadsheet technique for calculating weighted averages.  I just list out my projects or choices one per row, and evaluate them against all the factors which I consider important to the decision in the columns.  Finally, I assign a relative importance level to each of the factors, and the simple spreadsheet calculates a “batting average” (overall score) for each project.

Have a look at the video to see what I mean, and feel free to download this example here

NOTE: be sure to download the spreadsheet here to follow along.
(My apologies for the visual quality of this particular video… please don’t
tell my Mom, OK?)

PS – Here’s an EASY decision: Live Personal Web Critique Club for just $9.95/mo. with the very good Dr. Glenn.  How could you go wrong?

Hope it helps,

The Very Good Dr. G 🙂

“A Life of Discipline is Better Than a Life of Regret”

The one quote I review each and every day is Jim Rohn’s
“A Life of Discipline is Better Than a Life of Regret”

One thing I’ve noticed as I’ve grown older (besides the ginormous
bald spot on my head and the need to pee every 43 seconds or
so) is that my greatest accomplishments weren’t things which
“jumped” into existence do to an amazing sudden insight…

No, my biggest accomplishments AND the things I appreciate
most in my life were the result of long term, daily disciplines.

– My most important relationship (Sharon, who also happens to
be my wife) developed over the course of a seven year, regular
friendship where we progressively deepened our trust and
worked on our communication

– My greatest friendships emerged from regular meetings
and shared events

– Every business I’ve ever successfully developed came from
a long term plan at which I incrementally chipped away day
by day, week by week, month by month, and year by year

– Every health goal I’ve ever achieved came about in the
same way.

And all of these accomplishments required maintenance too!
It’s not like you can just forget about everything else, floss your
teeth for 24 hours straight, and then not have to worry about it
the rest of your life.  (Although if there’s some dentist out there
working on a way to do this, please come see me because I
want to give you a big hug)

Anything worthwhile requires discipline…it’s just a fact of life.

Without discipline, the center does not hold.

Without discipline you don’t have accomplishments, you have regrets.

So every day I get up and I thank Jim Rohn for that quote…

And remind myself I must be willing to pay the price.

Because as the years go by, the years go by!  We will all definitely
be one day older tomorrow… the question is, will we one step
closer or one step farther away from our goals?

And the great thing is, it’s entirely within our power to decide!

Onwards and Upwards,

The Very Good Dr. Glenn 🙂

PS – One of the most important disciplines I practice each day
is reviewing a website from the “Golden Glove(tm)” perspective.
The Golden Glove is a set of five power principles operating
any time money changes hand anywhere in the world.  It’s easy
to learn those principles… but translating theory into practice
is another thing entirely.  Analyzing what’s working in a given
market, rank ordering the top vendors from best to worst
according to their successful ad-spend, and then comparing
and contrasting these on the Golden Glove is perhaps the
MOST powerful thing I’ve discovered in the marketing world.
And now you can watch me to it live each month for just
$9.95/mo.  You can even get me to do it in YOUR market.

Unlimited Traffic, Human Bug Meat, and a Major Announcement

TRUE OR FALSE?:  This Disgusting Picture Can Help You Get an Unlimited Stream of Buying Traffic to Your Website, 100% Immune to Major Search Engine Whims and Social Media Platform Changes ?  TRUE! 

“I Am Human Bug Meat!” is  the strangest blog post title I ever devised,
but believe it or not, understanding how and why I did it can help you unlock
a flood of qualified traffic for your site!  Indulge me for a few moments and you’ll see why…

A few summers ago I was aggressively working on climbing all 48 four thousand food mountains in New Hampshire.  I had quite a bad experience on one trail. If you’re interested in the full story, please search the blog for the post, but for our purposes today suffice it to say I got some very bad advice from a guy I passed on the way up the trail.  A guy who seemed to know what he was talking about… but led me into a situation where I got swarmed by literally thousands of tiny bugs.

It was like a scene from a horror movie. I ran for my life and managed to get away… but not before they inflicted a few hundred bites, leaving my arms looking like some weird kind of red cottage cheese.

Now, you might think the first thing I’d be thinking as I was being eaten alive and running
for my life would be “Holy crap… how am I going to get out of this!!!”… but being the sicko marketer that I am, that wasn’t it.

Instead I thought “I’m going to get a FLOOD of traffic to my site with this story!!!!

And I did.

See, I’ve trained my marketing brain to look for unusual events in my own life which
trigger intense emotion, survival instincts, or which I know can be associated with images that are impossible to ignore.  I don’t worry so much about HOW I’m going to logically relate
these images to my audience’s needs at first.  I just have my mind set in “capture mode”,
and because of this, I’ve always got a whole host of stories, images, and anecdotes at the
ready.

Now, that doesn’t mean I use those stories willy-nilly.  But I find whenever I want to teach
some key marketing point, I can search my data-bank of these captured stories,  anedotes,
and images and inevitably I find a connection.

For example today I wanted to reiterate the Unlimited Traffic Technique which Jonathan
Mizel taught me so many years ago…

Which in essence begins with your ability to capture your prospect’s attention.

Combining  “human bug meat” with traffic benefits in an email subject line
creates a kind of insatiable curiosity.  I mean, if you hadn’t clicked on that email
when your head hit the pillow this evening you wouldn’t be able to sleep because
you’d be thinking “What the hell is human bug meat, and what does it have to do
with unlimited traffic?”

But let’s take this all the way home.

How can attention getting curiosity and benefits get you an unlimited stream
of qualified buyers to your website… totally immune to the whims of major
search engines and social media platforms?

By dramatically improving your per-visitor conversion so that you earn more per visitor
than anyone else in the market, that’s how!

The Unlimited Traffic Technique

Way back in 2003 Jonathan Mizel described something which literally blew my internet marketing mind.  He called it “The Unlimited Traffic Technique” and the essence of it was this:  IF you’re the guy/gal who makes more money off a web visitor than everyone else in the market, AND you offer a very generous affiliate commission, then most of the traffic in that market should tilt in your favor.

For example:  I make $25 per lead, everyone else makes $10.  I offer a $12.50 so the other merchants say “why the heck should I bother with customer service, cost of goods, shipping, product development, and all these other hassles when I can make  $2.50/lead more with Glenn for doing NOTHING but sending him the traffic?”

See what I mean?

And that’s what Dan Kennedy means when he says you need to “engineer the economics of your business so you can PAY MORE for a lead than everyone else in the market”.  (This is contrarian to say the least… while every other business is trying to pay as little as possible, obsessing about efficiencies… you figure out how to pay MORE  and you can dominate the market)

IF you can reach this position, the experience is literally mind blowing. Because whereas you previously had to beg for joint ventures,  eek out a profit on exhaustively optimized advertising, or expend eons of precious time on search engine optimization or social media… all of a sudden everyone needs YOU.

It’s like holding a glazed ham in a room packed with Doberman Pinchers… you’ve actually gotta take care to protect yourself, they come at you so fast.

You can also pay more than your competitors to hire the people who are most expert with Facebook, Google, Bing, Pinterest, SEO, etc.   You can hire an army of bloggers and social
media marketing experts… at least more than your competitors can.

Everything tilts in your favor.

The point is, what you are currently thinking of as a traffic problem is really a conversion problem.  You do NOT need to find a cheaper traffic source.  You need to earn more from
each visitor so you can afford to play with the big boys.

You need a higher percentage of visitors to actually buy your products and services than
your competition.  Take care of THAT problem and everything else starts to fall in place
naturally.  A business grows up around you.  People are suddenly available to work with
you and take the implementation nightmare that’s overwhelming you off your plate.

Here’s an old video I made to describe the Unlimited Traffic Technique… which still applies
equally as much today as it did then…and will apply just as much in ten years as it does today!

Please note that the offer at the end of the video has changed.  While we HAVE re-opened
the Make Them Buy Club, we now only charge $9.95/mo so there is no reduction in price
for the first month.  (It used to be $34.95/mo)

REMEMBER: The offer at the end of the video has changed.  While we HAVE re-opened
the Make Them Buy Club, we now only charge $9.95/mo so there is no reduction in price
for the first month.  (It used to be $34.95/mo)

 

Now, please know learning the right formula for getting people’s attention (benefits + curiosity) is only ONE piece of the conversion puzzle.  The rest has to do with researching your market,
making sure you’re appealing to a very specific audience with a very specific problem to solve,
making a truly unique promise to that audience, overwhelming them with proof, giving them
an irresistible offer, and a reason to act now.

It’s all much easier said than done, which is why we have the club.  You can get live, practical
advice from me personally… and watch as we turn theory into action on site after site after site.

Plus, if you join this month we still have left an additional bonus in the club – our best-conversion insight summary from previous clubs.  This is a 90 minute video which you can
use to help earn more from your site as soon as tomorrow.

And in case you’re wondering… yes, I do have selfish reasons for offering all this for just
$9.95/mo.  I know a small percentage of you will be interested in our other programs, services,
and coaching and consulting options.  But there is NO obligation and NO pressure to take us
up on this…

And of course everything is guaranteed or your money back.

So you’ve got everything to gain and nothing to lose by coming on in for a month.

Let’s do this thing OK?

www.MakeThemBuy.com

A Marketing Lesson from 1985

BEFORE WE START TODAY: Make Them Buy Conversion Club Has Now Reopened!
Get live, personal attention to dramatically increase sales for just $9.95/mo

In 1985 I was 21 years old and just about to graduate from Stony Brook University. Sharon and I were already good friends – we were both attending my father’s psychotherapy training center (CPCA – “The Center for Psychotherapy as a Creative Art”).

Sometimes the training meetings were in the official offices on 11th street in NYC (“The Village”), and other times we met in my Dad’s living room.

In any case, during one of the events at home Sharon happened to come early to find my father eating his breakfast. No sooner did she sit down at the table with him than she noticed, to her incredible dismay, that the little black dots in my Dad’s oatmeal were moving.

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! MARTY!!! You’re eating bugs!!!” – she screamed.

“No I’m not!” my Dad said. Those are the raisins.

“NO! MARTY!!! THEY ARE BUGS!!!!!!!  THEY ARE *$#&%*$# BUGS!!!” she retorted with disgust.

Well, my Dad put on his glasses, looked down at his oatmeal and said “Hmmmmmmmmm. I guess they are. Tasty ones too” (Dad has always had a sense of humor! Thankfully he did stop eating them though.)

So what’s the marketing lesson?

Human psychology and desire are overwhelmingly powerful. When we’re too close to a situation, we tend to see what we WANT to see, hear what we WANT to hear, taste what we WANT to taste, and smell what we WANT to smell.

My father isn’t a stupid person.  Quite to the contrary, he’s not only got a Ph.D. and a very
successful practice in New York City… he’s run an entire department at the Post Graduate
Center, published several books, and supervised dozens of other successful therapists…

Yet, LIKE ALL OF US, when he really wanted to experience a certain thing he crafted his
perception to match.  My Dad was working really hard that day… he had a lot of things
on his schedule.  He didn’t want to throw out the oatmeal, go to the store, buy another
box, etc.  That would be WAY too painful, if he could even make time to do it.  No, Dad
really wanted some oatmeal with raisins, and his mind showed him what he wanted to see.

It happens to the best of us.  But it’s particularly dangerous for marketers.

One of the biggest problems with developing a marketing mind is that reality is often
too painful for you to see clearly when you apply it to your own stuff.  For example,
it’s not uncommon for the real solution to a marketing problem to be radically changing
the offer.  This can involve creating an entirely new product.  Or you may need to reduce
your margins considerably on what you THOUGHT was going to be your profit center…
but really, given the state of the market you need to use it as a loss-leader.  Or perhaps
you need to change your USP and you’ve now got to go through a thousand web pages,
dozens of follow up messages, and a graphic redesign.

Ugh!  That’s WAY too painful.  So what do most of us do?

We decide bugs taste like raisins, that’s what we do!

We leave our campaigns the way they are, settling for MUCH lower bottom line
profit than we need to…

Or we might give up on a project entirely when in reality we were just a few
changes away from an incredibly successful business.

What’s the solution?

No matter how good a marketing eye you have yourself, you need an outside
perspective.  But NOT from just anyone.  Too many people accept marketing
advice from whomever vomits it up in a forum, or is willing to look at the
site.

No, you need to get advice from people who can answer ONE CRITICAL QUESTION in the affirmative “Have you personally profited more than one million dollars from direct response advertising in which you risked your own money”  (Not newbies, or people who are
constantly “talking theory” and THINK they know how to improve your site)

There ARE a few people out there like that.

I happen to be one of them.

And now you can get live, personal attention in my conversion club to help dramatically improve your sales… for just $9.95/mo.

Maybe I can be your personal Web Sales Hero?

See you there, OK?

The Very Good Dr. Glenn 🙂

Get live, personal attention in my conversion club to help dramatically improve your sales… for just $9.95/mo.

Glenn Livingston Has Been Arrested

It’s 100% true…Glenn Livingston was arrested. Take a look at the mugshot herePretty scary what you can learn using Google Alerts!

Well, I haven’t been arrested, I’ve just been a little busy with health issues, which are all thankfully MUCH better now.  But you know what?  I very well could be arrested by the internet pricing police when they find out about this: I’ve decided to re-open the live web-critique and conversion club for just $9.95/mo.  That’s right, you can now get live, personal help from the REAL Dr. Glenn Livingston for less than the cost of your grandma’s swimsuit… and as an added bonus you won’t need therapy after looking at it!

Seriously, what if all that stood between you and three times more profit from your existing traffic were just a few simple tweaks?  What if you could get LIVE, individual, personalized help from ME to dramatically improve your site’s sales conversion?  And what if you could also watch the best of the best recorded-live web critiques I’ve done so you could actually see how theory gets implemented on real sites with real people…

For just $10/mo?

I’m happy to announce the grand-reopening of the Make Them Buy Club now at just $9.95/mo.

This is a live, monthly web-critique club which was one of the most successful things I’d ever done about three years ago.  However, I had to close it because, at the time, it was consuming too much of my personal bandwidth and I didn’t yet have enough trained conversion experts to properly assist me with the preparatory work.  (Because we thoroughly research what’s working in the market before we review a site, it can take 20+ hours of a skilled marketer’s time to provide the context necessary for the review)

In any case, with the development of my other live training and certification systems, all that’s changed now!  And in retrospect, I realize the live, monthly web critiques were a big part of how I helped others become successful.  For these reasons (and others you can read on the site,) I’m now going to RE-OPEN the club…

And even better, because the primary purpose of the club is to give you all a chance to connect with me personally and warm up to my methods–not to generate a profit in and of itself–I’m going to offer it for a measly $9.95/mo.

Now, as you might suspect I DO have a selfish reason for doing this.  I’m secretly hoping some of you will want to move on to our marketing coach certification program once you see all the value in the club. But there’s absolutely NO obligation for you do to so, and I know up front that only a very small percentage of people will want to do this… so I promise there’ll be NO pressure!

Plus, I’ve included several immediately downloadable items which will open your sales-conversion mind wider than a hippo’s mouth in just a few hours…as soon as you log in!  (You don’t have to wait for the first live event):

– The BEST conversion insights of the previous club!  As soon as you’re inside, head over to the recordings section and download the “Best Of” video to see a succinct, 90 minute review of the most powerful sales insights from the previous reviews we’d done and markets we researched

– Several recorded full critiques for you to get a sense of what you’ll have to look forward to in the LIVE events…

– And of course, the customary bonus audios and videos which were previously associated with the course.  (Click through to the website to review them please)

Now, if the opportunity to work with both myself personally AND one of my best trained conversion coaches, as well as the above isn’t worth $9.95…I’ll shave my head and dress up like a bunny rabbit!  

But I’m not too worried about having to do that…

Because trust me, you won’t want me to do this once you see what’s inside.  (You wouldn’t want me to do it if you ever actually saw me dressed up like a  bunny rabbit either, but that’s entirely besides the point)

Now, if the above isn’t enough to get you to join the grand-reopening of the Make Them Buy Club now for just $9.95/mo, here’s my best puppy dog face to motivate you:

GlennPuppyHeadShot2011

The Very Good Dr. G 🙂

PS – Seriously, you don’t want to miss this opportunity.  I was hounded for
almost two years to re-open the club by literally hundreds of previous clients
who thought it was the most practical and immediately useful thing I’d ever
published.  I happen to have been more interested in the hyper-responsive
marketing club at the time, but admittedly it took a LOT more time, energy,
and propeller-headed dorkiness to make use of the information there than
in the Make Them Buy Club.   This club is just straight forward conversion
advice.

PPS – what makes Make Them Buy different than other LIVE web-critiques you
may have participated in previously is our emphasis on context.  See, we don’t
just jump in and vomit our spontaneous ideas about the sites we review.
Instead, we exhaustively research the market first, paying very careful attention
to which advertisers have been proven to sustain expensive positions in
the market first, and then rank ordering and comparing their USPs, calls
to action, brand positioning, the specific problem they appeal to, etc. Click here to learn more.

PPPS – Are you still reading?  WTF!!?  Listen, if you miss this opportunity the
odds are very good you’re going to want to repeatedly smack yourself in the
head with a spatula!  And I can’t have that on my conscience.  I’m happy to
announce the grand-reopening of the Make Them Buy Club now at just
$9.95/mo.  

 

 

 

Glenn’s Doing Much Better Now

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to everyone who contacted me with experts, books, ideas, emotional support, and other resources. I am doing MUCH better than my last post…

– I have found a work position which does not cause migraines.
– I have a better diagnostic understanding of my back problem, and am able to eliminate the numbness in my legs provided I don’t sit for too many hours in a row and stretch/invert like a fiend
– I am not losing muscle strength in my leg as I feared

In short, I’m back in the saddle again, almost 100%!

There’s nothing like the power of asking 30,000 people to help solve your most difficult problems… I’m now convinced building and caring for this list was perhaps the 2nd best thing I’ve ever done in my life. (After marrying Sharon of course)

I’ve tried my best to respond to everyone who reached out individually, but I wanted to update the blog just in case some of you hadn’t heard and/or my email was missed.

Onwards and Upwards!

Dr. G 🙂

Glenn’s Feeling a Little Desperate – Can You Help?

GLENN REALLY NEEDS SOME HELP (FEELING A LITTLE DESPERATE):
I’m struggling with a medical difficulty which is preventing me from working very much at this time. I was hoping to use my “hive mind” of friends, family, colleagues, customers, as well as their friends, etc to brainstorm a possible solution both to the medical problem, but more immediately to the work situation.

Here’s my story…

– In 1998 I was hit by a drunk driver. My car was totaled but I walked away, supposedly unscathed (and un-evaluated by professionals)

– In 2001 I switched from doing psychotherapy full time to working on the computer full time. I began to get blinding migraines after just a half hour on the computer.
– I was almost entirely unable to work for about a year, but found ways to adapt using chiropractic, massage, and a variety of exercises, getting my work capacity up to a few hours at a time.

– In 2007 I was treated for Lyme Disease and my work capacity improved a bit, but still remained limited. (I think I could sit for about 1/3rd as long as other over-achievers )

– In 2011 I discovered the Treadmill Desk, which almost completely restored my capacity. I could work a normal day, actually enjoyed walking while I worked, and only got headaches if I went for hours and hours without a break (which nobody should do anyway!)

– In 2012 my left leg became numb and I was diagnosed with sciatica. The chiropractor and physical therapist agreed it was because of a ginormous (22 mm) leg length discrepancy which caused a kink in my spinal chord, and aggravated the disk between L4 and L5 in my spine the more I walked.

– Since I wasn’t in pain but only experienced an annoying numbness, I went along with a treatment plan involving progressively higher leg lifts (eventually built into my shoe), an inversion table, and massage.

– This year (2015) I began noticing the loss of significant muscle strength in the left leg. And the PT diagnosed gluteal wasting. They send me for an MRI and was diagnosed with a bulging disk. They said if this continues I would lose the use of my leg!

– I was then referred for Spinal Decompression therapy (Spinemed). This had an impact for a few hours after I got off the table, but the symptoms always returned in full force when I went back to the treadmill desk (which was, and still is, the only real way I can work for substantial periods without getting migraines)

– The decompression doc said the first chiropractor had the wrong diagnosis. He said the coating around my spinal chord (the meninges) had been “bunched up” during the accident all those years ago and was creating the illusion of a leg length discrepancy by pulling up on the left leg. When he did a C2 adjustment, he said the discrepancy all but disappeared. This was subsequently confirmed via a series of leg and hip X-rays.

– Then I was told to take the lifts OUT of my shoe (there’s a 5 mm discrepancy remaining) and get orthotics instead. I should also spend more time on the inversion table and less time standing and walking on a flat surface. This makes sense given the newly confirmed diagnosis. At least I think it does.

– Since I was walking on a treadmill between 6 and 10 hours most days (excluding breaks) for work, I would have to find a new way to work again. I unfortunately found that after all these years standing up I have virtually NO ability to sit down and work. In fact, sitting now also aggravates my sciatica.

So I ordered a fancy spaceship from Ergoquest (the Ergoquest Zero Gravity Workstation 2a – still in evaluation period.) Basically you can get into almost any reclined or semi-reclined position. I’m going back and forth with the owner to try and make modifications, but I’m finding this too causes migraines after a half hour or so

– I can work in bed with a monitor hanging over me from the ceiling for an hour or two, but then I get migraines from that too

– Interestingly, I have no problem exercising as long as it’s not on a treadmill or other motion which causes repetitive stress. For example, hiking seems to make it better. So does swimming, most exercise classes, yoga, etc. It’s also better after a good night’s sleep. But as soon as I add the computer work I get migraines.

– I’m trying to learn Dragon Naturally Speaking (dictation) but it’s exceedingly slow going. I know the ultimate solution will be to stop typing and mousing… but I just can’t keep up with my work using it. Not even close… at least not yet.

So I’m really in a pickle. I’m only 50 years old and NOT ready to retire! I’ve got many things to accomplish, partners to keep up with, and goals to achieve. I suppose I could just stop working on the computer and do psychotherapy and coaching by telephone, but that’s not really who I am anymore. I’ve started some VERY BIG things which have some serious traction and I want to see them through.

Because I feel much better in the morning, MUCH better after the inversion table, and much better when I don’t walk on the treadmill for a day I DO have hope this can be cured. It seems like if I just didn’t walk/stand much but only slept, exercised, inverted, and went for the spinal decompression again I’d get steadily better all around. But I’d have to find some other viable work position in order to do this…

And I don’t want to go the surgical route because of the half dozen people I know who’ve done this in similar situations, NONE of them have anything good to say about it.

Which is why I’m asking for your help to brainstorm possible solutions.

Has anyone out there ever gone through something similar? If so, what worked/didn’t/helped even a little?

Are there any weird positions, contraptions, and/or ways of working I’m not thinking of?

Does anyone know anything diagnostically which I could be missing? Tests I should have done? Doctors to see? I’m open to going anywhere in the country (or the world) if I’m convinced the right doctor is there to help. But travel does aggravate both conditions (sciatica plus migraines) too so I’d have to be really sure.

Anyone know how to learn Dragon Naturally Speaking faster?

Do you know anyone you might share this post with that might have better answers to these questions even if you don’t?

COULD YOU KINDLY SHARE THIS MESSAGE WITH ANYONE YOU THINK MAY KNOW SOMETHING WHICH COULD HELP?
Feeling a little desperate and hoping someone can help.

Thanks!

How to Write an Amazon Book Description That Sells – In Under 60 Minutes

It’s the awful truth, but if your description isn’t making your potential readers crave the secrets locked inside your book, then all the hard work you did writing the book itself may go to waste.

My friend and partner Yoav Ezer, now CEO of a website development and strategic consulting firm for authors was kind enough to put together this full training for you.  It’s well worth a watch and listen!

Get the “Amazon Book Description That Sell” Guide

The guide includes:

  • A Short and Simple step-by-step process for creating a book description that sells
  • A “Description worksheet” – Just fill in the blanks to outline your book description
  • The “Book Description Checklist”
  • Four tested bullet templates that create a heightened sense of curiosity about your book

And if you’re interested in getting a complete website and marketing platform for your book, check out…

www.BestSellerWebsites.com

You can read all about the service, and sign up for it by filling the questionnaire at the bottom of the page.  Serious inquiries only please.

Christopher Columbus was a Dickhead Marketer

Christopher Columbus Was a Dickhead Marketer

Last Columbus Day my good friend Howie Jacobson pointed me to a revealing article in “The  Oatmeal” about Christopher Columbus  (IMPORTANT: Since publishing this post it’s been pointed out the article on the Oatmeal itself has possibly relied upon erroneous sources. If true, then Christopher Columbus wasn’t really a dickhead, and I might have been a dickhead myself for not checking the Oatmeal’s sources more thoroughly.   I’m therefore now going to frame my post in the this context “I don’t really know whether Columbus was a dickhead.  He could have been a really nice guy.  I’m guessing probably not, but he might have been.  Everything which follows was based upon the facts quotes by the Oatmeal article linked to at bottom.  I’ll leave it to you to make up your own mind.  I think it’s a worthwhile to post for marketers to read regardless” – Glenn. )

In the article I learned:

  • Nobody actually really thought the earth was flat in 1492 because the Ancient Greeks proved it was round almost 2,000 years earlier
  • Leif Ericson discovered America about 500 years before Columbus.  And how can you “discover” a land which is already populated by organized tribes anyway?
  • Columbus was much more interested in the Gold he found in America than establishing better trade routes for the Europeans

Our hero also correctly assessed the Lucayan natives as a generous, hospitable, kind people… whom he could exploit and slaughter for his own profit.  And on his next voyage Mr. Columbus convinced the Queen of Spain to back his exploits with 1500 men armed to the hilt.   (Think “raising capital” for a venture)

When he reached shore, he and his army demanded food, gold, and sex from the Lucayan women…cutting off the ears and noses of any dissidents.   The Lucayans rebelled and interfered with his plans a little.  So our dear Christopher took 500 of them back to the Queen to serve as slaves.  Hundreds died en route.

If this weren’t cruel enough, Mr. Columbus enslaved another 500 natives to be kept in the New World, and allowed his men to hunt them down for sport.  After they were killed, he let their bodies be fed to the men’s dogs to keep them healthy.

It gets worse and worse… I could go on and on.  If you’re really interested, go read the article for yourself (I’ll give you a link at the bottom of this post.)

Columbus really was a dickhead who ignored the human rights and basic dignity of the “undervalued asset” he had “discovered”…and then arranged to market that asset to the Queen and the Spanish people for as much profit as he could possibly muster.

Why did I tell you this story?:

  1. I want you to carefully consider how you choose your heroes.  Most Americans have little to NO idea about the true exploits of Christopher Columbus.  We honor and celebrate him with a Holiday, but few of us know  more than a few trite sayings put forth in a long game of telephone from historian to historian.  Similarly, you may be under the influence of people in the marketing world whom you know precious little about.   Mythology has a life of it’s own, so always ask HOW you know what you think you know about someone who’s advice you’re about to take on significant business decisions.
  2. To show you how easily people can get carried away when they see an opportunity to exploit.  It’s one thing for us all to sit in judgment of the obviously despicable things Mr. Columbus did.  It’s quite another for us to hold ourselves to a higher standard when we find undervalued assets of our own ready for the taking.  In a truly ethical business transaction, everybody benefits.  It’s easy to SAY you operate like that, but pretty hard to do when you find yourself in the power position.

Terry Dean and I are looking for a few more ethical marketers this month who want to leverage OUR tested and proven systems to find undervalued assets in other people’s businesses and help them profit.  (So they’ll pay your premium business coaching fees!)  It just may be the fastest way to turn your passion for marketing and business into a lucrative, rewarding, and fun career. Dickheads need not apply:

www.GrowthAccelerationSystems.com 

Onwards,

Dr. G 🙂

PS – We’re taking people for just a few more days or until we fill our 30 person quota.  So if you’ve got any interest at all now is the time to apply.

PPS – Here’s the article on Christopher Columbus in The Oatmeal.